Archive for September, 2009

Fake Pregnancy Centres Create Fake Orphans

We admit it. Here at DAMMIT JANET! and back at Birth Pangs, we’ve been a tad obsessed with Crisis Pregnancy Centers/Centres.

We — OK, who am I trying to kid? it’s mostly moi — blog regularly about the lying and deception and manipulation these Christofascists perpetrate on vulnerable women. (And of course, just to blow our own horn a little, we did have a helluva good time helping persuade the Ottawa Senators to pull financial support from one of the lying-liar outfits.)

But it seems there is a whole other ugly side to these fakers, even though I did blog once about a crisis pregnancy centre in Ireland that was convicted of running an illegal adoption agency.

So, I should not have been surprised to read today that ‘Christian Organizations Shame and Coerce Women Into Giving Up Their Children’. It’s a longish article by Kathryn Joyce, author of ‘Quiverfull: Inside the Christian Patriarchy Movement’.

Using good old shame and guilt, they pressure single pregnant women into giving up their children to ‘good’ Christian families. And with their usual disregard for truthiness, they lie to women about the terms of ‘open’ adoption. Women think they’ll be able to see their children only to find out, oopsie, no, you can’t honey.

Pregnant women are housed with ’shepherding’ families, isolated from friends and family who may offer other advice.

After delivery, women are rushed into surrenders. Taken to states with shorter ‘change one’s mind’ periods. Paperwork is delayed until the ‘change one’s mind’ period is just about up.

And such shenanigans go back a ways:

In 1984 Leslee Unruh, founder of Abstinence Clearinghouse, established a CPC in South Dakota called the Alpha Center. The first center had opened in 1967, but in 1984 Unruh’s CPC was still a relatively new idea. In 1987 the state attorney’s office investigated complaints that Unruh had offered young women money to carry their pregnancies to term and then relinquish their babies for adoption.

“There were so many allegations about improper adoptions being made and how teenage girls were being pressured to give up their children,” then-state attorney Tim Wilka told the Argus Leader, that the governor asked him to take the case. The Alpha Center pleaded no contest to five counts of unlicensed adoption and foster care practices; nineteen other charges were dropped, including four felonies. But where Unruh left off, many CPCs and antiabortion groups have taken up in her place.

(Read more about Leslee Unruh in an article by Amanda Robb, niece of murdered abortion provider Dr Bernard Slepian.)

In a sadly ironic twist, the crap works best on religious, anti-choice women.

Religious women may be particularly susceptible to CPC coercion, argues Mari Gallion, a 39-year-old Alaska mother who founded the support group SinglePregnancy.com after a CPC unsuccessfully pressured her to relinquish her child ten years ago. Gallion, who has worked with nearly 3,000 women with unplanned pregnancies, calls CPCs “adoption rings” with a multistep agenda: evangelizing; discovering and exploiting women’s insecurities about age, finances or parenting; then hard-selling adoption, portraying parenting as a selfish, immature choice. “The women who are easier to coerce in these situations are those who subscribe to conservative Christian views,” says Gallion. “They’ll come in and be told that, You’ve done wrong, but God will forgive you if you do the right thing.”

Mirah Riben, vice president of communications for the birth mother group Origins-USA [which calls itself 'The voice of mothers who lost children to adoption'], as well as author of The Stork Market: America’s Multi-Billion Dollar Unregulated Adoption Industry, says that many mothers struggle for decades with the fallout of “a brainwashing process” that persuades them to choose adoption and often deny for years–or until their adoptions become closed–that they were pressured into it. “I see a lot of justification among the young mothers. If their adoption is remaining open, they need to be compliant, good birth mothers and toe the line. They can’t afford to be angry or bitter, because if they are, the door will close and they won’t see the kid.”

. . . .

There were nineteen lawsuits against CPCs between 1983 and 1996, but coercive practices persist. Joe Soll, a psychotherapist and adoption reform activist, says that CPCs “funnel people to adoption agencies who put them in maternity homes,” where ambivalent mothers are subjected to moralistic and financial pressure: warned that if they don’t give up their babies, they’ll have to pay for their spot at the home, and given conflicted legal counsel from agency-retained lawyers. Watchdog group Crisis Pregnancy Center Watch described an Indiana woman misled into delaying an abortion past her state’s legal window and subsequently pressured into adoption.

As they say, go read the whole thing, though if you want to check out the other links, you’ll have to do it from here since I put them in.

BONUS: The first commenter, Amy Adoptee, has a blog. Go read, especially this one.

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Pregnancy Stories By Age: Diane, 46+, delivered a baby girl

Seven miscarriages and five unsuccessful in vitro fertilization cycles threatened Diane’s pregnancy hopes.

Doctors could not explain why Diane, 46, had experienced so many miscarriages and no success with Assisted Reproductive Techniques. She started treatment with Dr. Wu in February, was pregnancy in June 1998, and delivered a baby girl in February 1999.

Life Begins… – Miscarriage stories of loss, hope & help
Stories of Pregnancy over 44 years old – sharing stories I find online, for inspiration!
You Can Get Pregnant in Your 40’s – Sharing articles, discussing options & suggestions

Recent Keyword Searches: first pregnancy at 46, pregnant at 49, is it perimenopause or pregnancy, pregnancy over forty stories, having a baby at 47 years old.

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Remembering Pregnancy

Pregnancy: I loved being pregnant, for the most part that is, although I was very sick most of it, (about 5 months). We lived in Washington during the first few months of my pregnancy next to Andrew’s parents house. I will always remember how Andrew just lit up when he found out I was pregnant! I woke him up in the early morning to tell him. It was nice to know why I was SO EMOTIONAL! Soon we moved to Idaho for School. I finished another semester at BYU-I. I was very proud of myself with the grades I had gotten. They weren’t as good as they normally would have been, but being in early stages of pregnancy, I think I did very well! Unfortunately it wasn’t working out for us there, so we started debating where to move, back home or somewhere else. We chose Utah, so once again we moved in our early marriage, and my pregnancy to Utah. During that time we also went to visit Andrew’s Grandpa Smith who was in the hospital. In may we went back up to Washington for Andrew’s family reunion, and while we were up there we visited my family too! When I had the baby my mom came down and helped me out when Myles was about 2 weeks old! It was so nice and she was very helpful. My sister Cori also came and helped me out when I actually went into labor, which I loved! And my sister Nona came down and made us dinner one time which was so delish! (Homemade refried beans!). The picture with all of the people is my family:)
I miss having the little flutters in my tummy. The first time I had felt him move we had gone to the hot springs, and I was really sick. I think he was upset because I jumped off the diving board! I wasn’t a very good pregnant woman. I even when four wheeling with that belly of mine.
But I will say having a baby is so much better than being pregnant. I love my little Myles.
The Cravings…
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The joys of pregnancy… NOT

because I am less mobile than normal I have to wear white knee high compression tights… these are the most unattractive things I have ever worn… they are to help with stopping blood clots forming in my legs which is fine, but how am I going to survive wearing them in November when its too warm to wear boots and trousers that cover them?

I also am getting varicose veins this time, had managed to avoid them with the first three. And the stretch marks lol… well they aren’t actually happening at all… ironically K did such a good job of stretching my skin that I haven’t got any new ones yet.

There’s also the continuous indigestion that I suffer, liquid mylanta is my friend, and the cravings for things at random times, last night it was cupcakes and ice cream, neither of which I had in the house, I am also finding that I like spicy food too….

Pregnancy is a rather strange thing, its a totally parasitic relationship that wreaks havoc on your body and mind, yet its still one of the most amazing things I have ever done, you spend 9 months watching your tummy grow, waiting for milestones to be reached, feeling the first kicks,or watching your tummy move cos bubs has hiccups. I am so lucky that I have had 4 awesome pregnancies to enjoy, I sometimes wonder about the one I lost but its hard to feel hugely for it in some ways because I didn’t know about it, and it could never have survived.

As I type I am getting kicked in my ribs, and I sit and wonder what this baby will be like, will it have brown eyes like its siblings and Dad or will I manage to get one with blue eyes? is it a boy or a girl? will it grow up to change the world? so many hopes and aspirations of mine yet actually all I hope for is that it is a loved and cared for part of our family.

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Post Pregnancy Weight Be Gone!: Toronto Women's 5K Race Report

We woke up a little late on Saturday morning, due to the fact the off button on the alarm got hit instead of the snooze button. Luckily both hubby and I are always organized the night before. So we were able to just get up and go!

After a quick stop to get some coffee, we drove down to Eglington/Leslie and to Sunnybrook Park, where the event was taking place. We made our way to the start and managed to find my BFF Marlene and a friend, who she was pacing. After some pictures, a quick potty break and a good luck kiss from hubby, I headed to the back of the start line. Since I was walking the race, and there were at least 500+ ladies, I didn’t want to get in the way

The gun (or horn) sounded promptly at 8 and we were off! Here I am crossing the start line:I had no real goals going into the race except to finish…….but as I got going, I felt great. And I thought that maybe I could possible beat my personal best in a 5k. My first 2k felt good. I passed a few of my fellow walkers, as the runner were also making their way back around to finish their own races. I saw some familiar faces on my way back, which felt great.

We continued onto the turn around and soon came to the only water station on the course, manned by firefighters! While they weren’t in full uniform (bummer) they were still not so hard on the eyes! I managed to stop for a photo at their request (very cool) and began to make my way back to the start (or finish?).

A familiar problem made itself known at about 3k. No matter what distance, around the halfway point of EVERY race I have participated in, it rears it’s ugly head.

Blisters.

I have two “hot spots” and both were up to their usual tricks. And it started to slow me down. But when I hit 4k and saw I was quickly being gained on, I really began to pick up the pace. With just a few hundred metres to go, I rounded the corner and saw the finish line. I was joined by M, and began to run a few metres with her. She brought me in and I finished a strong 51:07:04 (chip time 50:19:01). I DESTROYED my previous personal best by over 4 minutes.

I grabbed some grub (including chocolate….yummy) and got a celebratory photo:

Overall, I was really happy with my finish. I think I could have been under 50 minutes if I hadn’t had my feet flare up. I really need to find a way to stop blisters. Anyone?

Up next, The Scotiabank 5K on September 27th. Again, I have no real goals except to finish. But we’ll see what happens!

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Pregnancy Stories By Age: My mother was 45 when she had me

I’m 38 now, and my mother was 45 -and my dad 47 – when they had me. I was not planned; in fact, at the time, it couldn’t have seemed like worse timing. (My brother, then 9, was undergoing brain surgeries due to hydrocephalus.)

Turned out that it was a blessing in disguise; I gave them something else to focus some of their attention on, and I brought great joy to my brother who felt very alone & scared. I also had a 20 year old sister and 16 year old brother at home at the time.

Life Begins… – Miscarriage stories of loss, hope & help
Stories of Pregnancy over 44 years old – sharing stories I find online, for inspiration!
You Can Get Pregnant in Your 40’s – Sharing articles, discussing options & suggestions

Recent Keyword Searches: women having babies at 48 year old, pregnacy success stories, 43 years old and want to get pregnant, pregnant at 50, successful pregnancies at age 43?

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EMC Frontline Pregnancy Centers Internship: First Week

I just came here almost two weeks ago, and I had never done pregnancy counseiling. At the begining I was nervious and I didn´t know how be strong showing the videos, or even being tough with the girls because sometime is needed it. I was afraid of stand up outside of thi clinics (well I am still coz you never know how the reactions can be), but suddenly I´ve learn to trust completely in God, how HE is providing the strength and the wise to have the right words to change girl´s mind and that open their hearts.

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Pregnancy/Miscarriage

I found out I was pregnant a few weeks ago. I went in to have my annual pap smear last week, and since I have a very irregular cycle, my doc decided to do an ultra sound to see how far along I am. Because of the timing of intercourse I though I was six weeks along. The doctor said that the baby only looked about five weeks, but that it was too small to even measure. He wrote it down in my chart that this is a “Threatened miscarriage”. I guess he thinks that the baby had died a week earlier, so I was going to miscarry it? I’m not really sure what to think. I am not bleeding or anything. I just wonder if any of you have gone through this. Thought you were farther along than you really were, or been diagnosed with a miscarriage, and if you were diagnosed, when did the bleeding start? He told me to come back in two weeks to have another ultrasound, but what am I to expect until then?

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Childbirth Drugs Cuts Chances Of Breastfeeding

breastfeedingA new research suggests that drugs that are commonly used to treat postpartum bleeding and other painkillers may hinder woman’s ability to breastfeed her baby.

The 10- year study of Swansea University research team confirmed the biological reason for the decline of breastfeeding rates in new moms, despite a huge government effort to encourage mothers to breastfeed their babies.

The Department of Health recommends that newborns should be breastfed for the first six months for various health benefits.

But, it has been found that only 45% of babies in U.K. are exclusively breastfeed for just one week after their birth and almost one in four newborns receive only formula milk from birth.

Rosemary Dodds, policy research officer for the National Childbirth Trust, suggests that it is important for women to understand the risks involved in anesthetic drugs given during childbirth and they need more support to start breastfeeding soon after giving birth.

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The Benefits Of A Cesarean Section Delivery

labor painsThere are admittedly many risks attached to the delivery of a baby by Cesarean Section, and proponents of natural or vaginal delivery do tend to highlight those at all given opportunities; however there are many benefits to a C section delivery as well, which are important to be aware of so that a woman can make an informed decision about an elective C Section if she so wishes:

Safety: Yes a cesarean birth is a major abdominal surgery and it involves all the risks associated with that, however medical science is now so advanced as to lower the risk so significantly that women can consider elective C Section birth.

C sections are now much safer than they used to be, and with them becoming more routine, surgeons are more skilled at this than ever before.

No Labor pain: Labor pains can be a very real downside to a vaginal delivery. Since labor pains can extend over a long period of time, it can be a harrowingly difficult and painful time for a woman.

There is of course the pain of an abdominal surgery to overcome, but after the first few days the pain is very manageable in most cases. Remember even in a vaginal delivery there is usually an episiotomy performed so there are those stitches to deal with.

In any case proponents of a C section will tell you that with this form of delivery you know the amount and duration of pain, whereas with a vaginal delivery you don’t know how long and severe your labor will be.

You can be conscious throughout and not have to suffer any pain of delivery. Post delivery issues like hemorrhoids etc are also not an issue with a C section.

Dignity and Privacy: A vaginal delivery is not the most private of things, with doctors and nurses milling around to check how dilated you are, and you being in a less than flattering position for any number of hours. A C section is over in a matter of some minutes.

No trauma for the child: Coming through the birth canal is quite an arduous process for a baby, who often comes out with an elongated or slightly misshapen head. In a C section the child is simply lifted out and has to undergo none of the rigors of a vaginal delivery. This is something to be considered too.

You can schedule the delivery: Proponents of natural childbirth generally are of the view that it is a process that should happen in due course rather than something you schedule, but this has to be a personal choice that a woman should be permitted to make without having to deal with guilt.

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